Hold on Till May
by LoveDrunk22
Summary: Ignored by her parents, Eponine spends most of her time in a tree trying to see if her parents would notice she was gone. Enjorlas helps her try to see that she doesn't need them, but will it be too late? Inspired by "Hold on Till May" by Pierce the Veil


**So this is my first Les Miserables story and it's modern day AU mainly because I'm just used to it, but also because I think the story I have in mind would go better as a modern day story. There is a trigger warning towards the end. It's inspired by "Hold on Till May" by Pierce the Veil, I hope you enjoy it.**

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_She sits up high, surrounded by the sun…_

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Everyday, Eponine Thenardier, would go up in a tree in her neighbor's front yard and look into the window of her own house to see if her parents would notice she was gone, they never did. She would sit up in that tree for hours, just waiting for the day her parents would notice she wasn't there, the only people that would notice where her siblings, but they weren't the people she was looking for acceptance from. She just wanted her parents to love her the way they had when she was a child, so everyday, she would just sit in that tree and dream of a better life where her parents would notice when she was gone, or care about her when she was upset, just something, she wanted to feel _loved.  
_When she wasn't up in that tree, she also went to school and had a group of friends. They called themselves Les Amis. They had their own leader known simply as Enjolras, sure he had a first name, but did anyone know it? No. That didn't stop them all from worshiping him, even calling him Apollo, because they thought he was a god.  
Anyway, she loved all of her friends, and they loved her, but no one knew that she was dying inside slowly, day by day as the abandonment from her parents grew worse and worse. It got to the point where Eponine would only be in the house if she really needed to; it's not like her parents cared anyway.  
One day, Enjorlas, Apollo, whatever you want to call him, saw Eponine climbing up the tree and saw how high up she went. He watched as the sun went down slowly and hit her in just the right spot, making it look like she was glowing, like she was sent from above almost.  
"What are you doing up so high?" he asked. He had known her for years and suddenly in their last year of high school, he found her up a tree.  
She looked down at him, frightened and said, "I like to come up here and think."  
"Really? Because it looked like to me like you were looking into the window of the people next door," Enjorlas called.  
Eponine didn't know what to say, so she just looked down at him.  
"Why are you looking into their window?" he asked after a long time of silence.  
"To see if they notice I'm gone," she said.  
He looked at the girl who was normally, witty, intelligent, and _happy_, now look broken. He didn't know what to do."I'm coming up there!" he said as he began to climb the tree.  
"Why?" she asked him, "don't you need to do some godly thing right about now?"  
He smiled as he heard the sarcasm coming back to her.  
"Well," he said as a smirk appeared on his face and he climbed up the tree, "I think it can wait."  
They sat there for a while and watching the sun go down. "So, how long have you been coming up here?" Enjorlas asked.  
"Since I was old enough to climb, I just always wanted to see if they would notice if I was gone, I've been doing this for years and not one day have they come outside in a panic looking for me, not one time did they looked worried, not one time did they look all over the house to see if they could find me," she said, "so then I just did it everyday to see if maybe, just maybe, they would come looking for me, even if it was to do something around the house, or to take care of my siblings, but no, never."  
He wasn't good with emotions, or feelings, but he hugged her as best he could being so high up a tree, he knew she needed someone.  
"Come on," he said after a while, "let's get the Amis together and go do something."  
She gave him a small smile, "Ok," she said and they began climbing down the tree.  
From that day on, he went up the tree with her everyday and, Enjorlas, the guy who didn't think he wanted or needed love, starting falling for the girl who spent most of her life up a tree, waiting to be noticed.

"Hey, 'Ponine, maybe you could move into my house, you know, since you spend most of your time at home up a tree anyway," Enjorlas said one day.  
"Enj, I don't like being a charity case," she told him, as she looked a little offended, what would make him think that she needed someone to make her feel better anyway? She was Eponine Thenardier; she didn't need anyone to take care of her. If there was anyone that was going to dig her out of the hole she was in, it was going to be her. Besides, people never keep their promises, what happens when Enjorlas changes his mind?  
"I didn't mean it like that," he said, "I just meant, I like having you around and I know that you feel really alone, just spend the night at least, please."  
"Apollo, Marble Man, are you begging me to stay with you?" she asked.  
"Yes," he said, "because I know what it's like to feel ignored. My parents are workaholics and are always trying to work so they have more money and so that they're higher up than anyone else, so please, let me help you. You know that I'm nothing like them, that's why I'm always trying to protest things, because we are all equal. Besides, you know how I feel about blushed as she remembered when he admitted his feelings for her one day when they were in the tree. From that day on they had been dating.  
Eponine looked into his blue eyes and saw nothing but sincerity behind them, she was unsure of everything he said, but how would she know if she never gave him a chance? She sighed, "Fine, but only a sleepover."  
He smiled, "I'll see you later then," he kissed the top of her head and walked away, but would turn around to look at her and would smile when he saw that she was still standing there, watching him.  
She wasn't sure about this, because she had never really had anyone who cared about her, but this could be different.

That night they were alone, both of his parents were away on business.  
"You really are amazing, Eponine," he said. Over time, he had become so much unlike himself when it came to the emotions of other people, he was still passionate about whatever cause it was that he was supporting at the moment, but now he also paid attention to how people felt about those things too, he began to see how different things affected different people in different way, and he began to learn how to help them out.  
"Thank you for coming over," he said as he looked down at the brunette in his arms.  
"Thank you for having me over," she said.  
"Anytime," he landed down and kissed her.  
She kissed him back and the passion grew within it as the kiss was deepened more and more, soon enough one thing lead to another and as they laid there in the aftermath of it all, Enjorlas realized that what they had was something special, it wasn't meaningless for either of them, there was too much passion, he realized that they had just made love.

Days afterwards, Eponine looked back at that night and wondered if it really meant that much to Enjorlas, what if he was just using her? What if she was just another one of his causes?  
He walked over to her and said, "Hey," as he grabbed both of her hands, "would you like to come over again tonight?" he asked.  
"Why, so you can say you're helping the emotionally unstable high school girl cause?" she asked, coldly.  
"No, you know you're not just a cause," he said surprised.  
"How do I really know that you just won't forget about me when you think that I'm better?" she asked him, "How do I really know?"  
"Do you really need proof after that night?" he asked her surprised.  
She looked away from him, "No one really cares about me, and I'm just another cause to you."  
"No, you know you're more than that to me. You know you're beautiful, let me help you," he said.  
"See? I'm just another cause, you don't actually care!" she said as tears started to form in her eyes and she tried to get out of his grip.  
His grip got tighter and he pulled her in closer. He lifted her head so he could look her in the eyes, "You are not just a cause, let me help you feel beautiful again."  
She sighed, "Fine, I'll let you try to prove to me I'm not just another cause to you."  
"Thank you," he said as he kissed her head, "thank you."

Everything seemed to be going fine with them again, but on the day of graduation when no one from Eponine's family showed up, her depression began again. She thought for sure that at least on a day that was so important to her, at least her siblings would show up, but as everyone was taking pictures with their families, and she was alone, watching them, feeling as all the old emotions came rushing back into her, her family really didn't care about her.  
People talked to her, but she couldn't hear them, her world was spinning and the monster that she thought she'd put to bed, came back stronger than ever. The voice in the back of her mind, telling her that no one actually cares, overcame the voice that told her that her friends did. But to her, it didn't really matter what her friends said or thought, the people that were the reason she was even alive didn't care about her, and that outweighed anything that anyone could ever say.

Enjorlas found her in up in the tree again with a raze blade that she hadn't used in months "If I were you, I wouldn't have gone back here," he said.  
She sighed; she seemed to be doing a lot of that lately, "I don't know what to do anymore. I don't know what to do, I feel, numb again."  
"You're just thinking about everything bad again, think about all the good times you've had, I know that you have some, I've been there for most of them, come down and give me the blade," he said.  
"I don't know, the blade is the only thing that's really been there for me from the start, I always seem to come back to it," she said with no emotion in her voice as she looked down at her blonde boyfriend as he pleaded with her.  
"Put the past behind you," he said.  
"What if I can't? What if it's a part of what makes me, _me_? How can I let go of it?" she asked him.  
"Ok, so it is a part of what makes you, you, but people get over things like this all the time, come down so I can show you that. Eponine, you'll be okay. Don't do anything stupid," he said as he had his hand out to catch her if she wanted to jump out of the tree.  
She looked at him and slowly got down from the tree, but first, she threw the razor blade down to him.  
When she got down he smiled at her, "Hey there, beautiful, I mean what I said, you'll be okay."  
She smiled at him, unsure of what she would feel or do when she was alone later on, but for now, she would enjoy her time with him.

Later on, when she was alone, and there was no one there with her but her thoughts, she began to slip again. She felt all the pain of never being loved by her parents again, she began to feel like all she would ever be was alone. She forgot everything Enjorlas had ever told her, and she felt defeated, her demons were wining. She can't handle the feelings of abandonment anymore. She starts to think of Enjorlas, but the voice in the back of her mind that was slowly taking control over her again, was telling her that he would get tired of her too, he would start to ignore he just like her parents had. The voice tells her to give up, and she begins to listen to it. Nothing felt fine anymore, she felt like she began to sink. She didn't have her anchor there, and her demons were eating her alive as she slowly crumbled.  
She picked up her phone and called Enjorlas.  
When he answered, it was clear that he'd been sleeping, "Hello?"  
She was crying as she said, "I'm so sorry."  
He began waking up faster than he ever had as he said, "What do you mean? Eponine, what are you talking about?" he asked as he began to get out of his bed and grab his keys to rush over to her house.  
"I'm sorry," was all she said. "Eponine, hang on," he said as he walked out of his house, got in his car, and started the engine.  
"I can't," she said as she hung up the phone, leaving Enjorlas to wonder what she was doing and what was going on.  
She was once again alone as she looked out her window and saw the tree that had been there for her more than the blades, and more than Enjorlas, that's where she would end all of her pain.  
She found rope and stool in her garage and walked outside to the tree, rope and stool in her hand. She stood on the stool as she tied the rope around her neck and to the tree. Enjorlas got there and saw the figure underneath the tree and ran over there.  
Before he could say anything, Eponine kicked the stool out from underneath her.  
"No!" he yelled as he ran to her and saw her hanging there.  
He looked around for something sharp and once he found it, he cut her down and undid the knot around her neck.  
When she began to breathe again she whispered, "Why did you help me?"|"Because, I can't let you give up on everything, you have so much to live for, if for nothing else, think of what it would do to me and the rest of the Amis," he said. "You may not feel like you're family cares about you, but think about us as your family, _we _care about you."  
"Ok," she breathed out.  
"I will help you," he said as he held her and kissed the top of her head.  
"Ok."  
"But I do have one question," he said.  
"What is it?"  
"If you knew I loved you more than anything, why would you try to leave me?"  
"I don't know," she said.

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…_this love was out of control 3, 2, 1, where did it go?_

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**Thank you for reading. **


End file.
